January 24, 2018, pound pound pound (the sound jerks me awake), and I lay there frozen for a moment in time. It has been 16 long days awaiting this moment anxiously. EVERYONE knows that knock. I knew before the door opened that it was the cops and a detective.
The Lives of Women Behind Bars (Pt. 6): From county jail to prison
By Jennifer (Taycheedah Correctional) (WI)
Forward By Christopher (Madison Correctional) (OH)
One of the things every prisoner remembers is their experience incarcerated at the county or city jail as they awaited conviction. County jails are filthy and unsanitary places. They’re rough. They’re unfriendly and they’re the first glimpse of a life to come.
I think one of the most challenging aspects off incarceration is coping. Coping with what? Well, that list is long: Coping with your situation, with the realization that your friends were only fair weathered; coping with the fact that even some in family have abandoned you. It’s a common truth and is seldom spoken about.. For those of us enduring lengthy sentences, the journey early on is about struggle and discovery. Some of what’s discovered is very painful.
I used to wonder about life after death and what lay beyond this reality we call life. When I was 20 years old I had a near death experience after complications with the flu. I kept my experiences from family and never spoke of it because I didn’t think anyone would believe me or understand. For many years I thought my experience was unique, but in fact people have been experiencing NDEs for more than a thousand years.
This is something that has been weighing on my mind for a while now. I have been incarcerated for three years. I still have a long lonely fourteen years to go. My question to you is, is it possible to find love while incarcerated? Is it possible to continue to love and be loved from a relationship prior to prison? Is it possible to be loved in prison by the ones you were closest to? I thought I could share a couple of stories with you, and then you can tell me what you think…
I was with the same man for 17 years, and I’m 32 now. If you calculate it, that’s over half of my life. I gave him all of me. We went through everything together (drug addiction, being homeless, death of a child, loss of a parent). I am an oldfashioned lover. I believe in sticking it out through the hard times, and the good will outweigh the bad. My husband didn’t work for 90% of our relationship, and yet I stayed because he was an amazing father and husband otherwise. I was raised to be independent, and never saw it as a problem. I am the type to never rely on a man for anything. A man should be a want not a need.